We had so much hope, right to the end,
I did not think I would be saying goodbye,
Watching him go to that place
Where neither of us expected to be...
A final breath and then peace...for him
But not for me.
For me, the war began...
The war of words and thoughts,
The war of screams and anguish,
The war of heavy breathing, trying to catch my breath.
Even with time, the war rages on,
But the battles are fewer
And I am limping more slowly.
A quietness has descended
But the sorrow has not abated.
The heartache is still there
Just not as loud.
We talk in my mind
And that saves my sanity.
The memories flow in copious amounts
And I am thankful that there is an abundant supply.
I am adjusting, albeit unwillingly
But it goes slowly and
I prefer it that way.