Wednesday, June 22, 2022

It's been five years......

From the time of the news of the diagnosis, there was never a moment when we thought he wouldn't beat this thing to a pulp. The choice of treatment was calculated out of intense and immense research and the course we took provided a good quality of life throughout the many months that followed.

Looking back now, even as we neared the end, we couldn't see around that corner. And even at the end, I never, not once, believed he would go. And when I hugged him and kissed him I didn't think it was goodbye. It took an instant to lose you. It will take the rest of my life to grieve.

With a love like ours, we always thought our lives together would be never-ending, that we would be together for the rest of our lives. But the realization is that he did live the rest of his life with me.  And what a magnificent life it was. 

When I think of the place where I found love, I think of being encircled in his arms, the place were I felt safe, warm,  protected, cherished, cozy, snug, loved and incredibly happy. 

My Darling, every minute without you has been excruciatingly painful deep within my heart. Time has changed nothing. I love you and miss you just as much as I ever did. I ache every day knowing you're not beside me. I carry within me your jokes and puns, your laughter and beautiful smile, your twinkling eyes, your loving touch. I keep my love for you deep within my soul, safe and everlasting.

I know you live on in the hearts of all you touched, especially our sons who miss you terribly. They channel you constantly with jokes and puns and are a constant reminder of the love we all shared.  We are your legacy. We are your voice and you live on in us. Our sons honor you in everything they do.

It's been five years that I've missed your arms around me. But the flashbacks of those memories will have to do. Even though the sorrow will never fade away until my heart stops beating, all the memories, those sweet memories are gifts you send to allow me an instant to reflect, to breathe, to get lost in the moment and to remember your life. 

I know you're watching over our sons and me. The love envelopes us like a beautiful cape. It's ever-present and comforting. 

My wonderful Warren, I miss you, my Darling. We had the greatest love story and I continue to live it with the sweetest of memories.

Copyright © 2022. Reisa Sterling Miller. All Rights Reserved.

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